IT’S NOT “WORTH IT!”

Whether you call them cheat meals, treat meals, off plan choices or planned deviations, all of us at one point or another will run into a situation on our ketogenic journeys where we are faced with a decision to eat something that is decidedly off of our usual menu. In this blog I wanted to help you with that decision of is this choice “worth it” by examining some of the factors on the other side of the fence aka when it is certainly not worth it!

Let me say first the common thread here is making a conscious decision whether it is planned out well in advance or moments before eating. I am not speaking to situations where you are feeling out of control. I think that most of us that use food as a coping mechanism or exhibit binge behavior understand that those moments do not line up with deciding if a decision is “worth it.”

So let’s get into it. The situation is a food choice or experience that is off of your eating plan, and you’re considering partaking with your eyes wide open. You might want to give thought to these factors that could make this a “not worth it” moment.

Not in Line with Current Goals

This one is pretty plain and simple. You set your goals and if making an off plan choice might impact them, this should be considered. Do not compromise something that you have decided is important to you for one choice. That said, a planned deviation does not derail all goals, I am speaking specifically to situations where it might, including personal challenges like 30 days of carnivore, etc.

Past Experience

A tough one, because while we can learn from past mistakes and experiences, sometimes we get wrapped up in the hope that “this time will be different.” If previous attempts to make planned and controlled off plan choices have triggered binges or unbearable cravings, it is not self limiting to say no this time. Working on our relationships with food is very much about accepting ourselves where we are at in the current moment and making the choices that keep up feeling in control. So if your past experiences have gone south, this is a great opportunity to examine them if you have not. What happened? How did you feel? Did you approach the situation and the period after in an inappropriate manner? You may ask yourself these questions and truly believe that you were mindful, cautious and aware when you made the choice, but you were still triggered. This is ok!! If you are concerned that you may face this challenge again, it is ok to say no.

You’re Feeling Driven by Emotion Not Reason

This one is why I believe consistent work on mindfulness with food decisions is important. So that you are not just starting new when faced with your off plan choice. I build this “muscle” by asking myself “Why am I eating this?” before I eat anything. It may seem odd but it eventually becomes a habit that supports my awareness of my choices and how I feel after making them. I work with many clients on this as I think it helps this who do struggle with food issues to build in a moment of pause before eating that can be helpful. If you are consistent with this it will not be out of the ordinary to ask this questions here, "Why do I want to make this choice?” Being able to clearly answer this question is important (more on that soon!) in this circumstance. The answer you get matters. If your answer at all feels like “I just want it.” I would give this some thought. Honestly there may be times you choose to proceed, but you’re doing this consciously. If you don’t like how how the answer feels, let that inform your choice.

Frequency & Timing

After spending some time in previous points talking through emotion and mindfulness, let’s get into something that might be a bit more concrete in its measure. Of the big truths I have learned in my life is that there is always a reason and opportunity to celebrate with “special” meals. It is not just about a few holidays. If it was, none of us would be here today reading this most likely! So if you are on a weight loss journey, and a few days ago had a planned deviation, and are now looking at another, know that it is completely okay to say “I had my moment already this week/month/etc.” You’re not ignoring your feelings or mindfulness, you’re being realistic about the impact that regularly making these choices could have on your goals and also on your well being. Stacking up “worth it” choices can definitely be a slippery slope for some of us. In these instances I remind myself that food is not going anywhere, holidays aren’t being cancelled, celebrations will continue, so choosing to stay on plan doesn’t mean I have to make that choice every day for the rest of my life. It is just the right choice for me right now.

Consequences Aren’t Worth the Choice

Let me first say that I am not just talking about the scale here. Yes, seeing the scale bump up can be a part of these choices, but the bigger consequences I am talking about is how we feel about that. And how we feel in general after we make food choices that might give us some physical or emotional upset. If part of your mindful consideration of an off plan choice is bringing up feelings of guilt or regret, these are red flags to consider. Be empowered to make the choice you believe is best for you and do not be unfair to yourself with negative thoughts and feelings after. If you know you are personally in a place right now where seeing a scale bump or dealing with lingering cravings could be too much for you emotionally, the choice isn’t worth it. This doesn’t mean give up working on this! But it can mean that you need more time to process those feelings before you make this choice.

The Question is Unanswered

I said I would come back to the question "Why do I want to make this choice?” And here we are! If you cannot answer this question, I honestly believe you have your answer. Don’t get mad at me for this one! Yes, often there are questions on these journeys we cannot answer immediately and must do some work to dig into over time. But if we’re talking about a food choice and you cannot find an answer that makes sense beyond “I want it,” then it just might be time to pass. I spent decades making food choices based on “wanting it” and I know where it got me. If this resonates at all for you, realize that your unease at answering this question is important and valid.

The message through all of these points is clear I hope. That being, you are certainly able to make the decision to have a planned deviation if made from a place of mindfulness. You are also able to say no to those choices if you are at all uneasy with the choice itself. This does not mean you are restricting inappropriately or punishing yourself. It also does not mean you are choosing not to participate in important moments. We are capable of making moments about more than food and I want you to feel empowered to do so.

What do you think? Am I on point here or did I miss something important? I would love to hear from you and even discuss this topic in depth!